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In an alternate universe where dimensions collide like poorly shuffled cards, Tanya Degurechaff, the pint-sized war machine from The Saga of Tanya the Evil, found herself inexplicably plopped into the pastel-hued streets of Mitakihara City. She adjusted her officer’s cap, her sharp blue eyes narrowing at the sight of schoolgirls giggling over ice cream cones. “What is this saccharine hellhole?” she muttered, her voice dripping with the disdain of someone who’d rather be calculating artillery trajectories than dodging friendship bracelets.

Nearby, Madoka Kaname, the soft-hearted heroine of Puella Magi Madoka Magica, was mid-conversation with her soul gem, contemplating the weight of her cosmic responsibilities. She turned at the sound of Tanya’s boots clicking on the pavement, her pink twin-tails bouncing as she tilted her head. “Oh! Are you lost? You look like you’re from… um, a war movie?”

Tanya’s lip curled. “Lost? I’m a lieutenant colonel of the Imperial Army, not some damsel wandering a battlefield. And you—what are you, a walking cotton candy advertisement?”

Madoka blinked, unfazed by the venom. “I’m a magical girl! I fight witches to protect everyone. It’s my duty, even if it’s hard sometimes.” She clasped her hands, her eyes shimmering with earnest resolve.

[See more…]

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